Awhile ago I put up a video on my twitter (@LordRecord) titled ‘How I got saved in 60 seconds..’. The response was amazing, but everyone was saying the same thing. ‘We need the full story!!!’. So twitter this one is for you, and yes that baby in the picture is me 🙂
Where it all Began
I wasn’t one who was raised in church, not at all. I was actually born an accident (which I found out later) and as with many accidents or anything you’re unprepared for, It can cause a lot of problems. My parents didn’t really see eye to eye and separated when I was very young. Young enough not to remember what my dad looked like growing up, I don’t even remember ever seeing a picture of him or anything. All I knew is that I was named after him. That’s right, I’m Sterling Record Junior and he’s Sterling Record Senior.
The Road of Unforgiveness and Anger
Growing up I would always ask my mum the same question. ‘Mum, where’s dad?’. The answer was always the same. ‘I don’t know Sterling’, but she did know that my dad had twin daughters who lived in America so I assumed that maybe he was there. If anyone ever asked where my dad was, I would say America (on a good day) or dead (on a bad day).
What I didn’t realise at that time is that I had serious unforgiveness, anger and a bunch of other issues bubbling up inside me that really started to show in my teenage years. Interestingly though, I was the perfect student in school but at home, I was nothing but trouble.
I decided to take out my pain on the two people I could hold responsible, myself and my mother. I would disobey anything and everything she said and just became difficult to live with. Unfortunately, a lot of the memories my close friend from that time have of me, is me defying my mother (something I’m definitely not proud of). As for me, I developed the life philosophy that; ‘If I wasn’t good enough for my Father to stick around, why would anyone else?’. Why would anyone else consider me valuable when the most important person (in my eyes) didn’t consider me valuable enough to stick around? This meant that I found it extremely hard to trust people. I expected people to leave, betray or desert me. So my guard was always up.
You can only take so much
Around age 15 it all became a bit too overwhelming. I would definitely say I became depressed, and even suicidal at certain points. I remember one evening being alone in the house, walking downstairs to the kitchen and seeing a knife left on the counter. It was like the knife had eyes and we were having a staring contest, while in my head I’m hearing ‘Do it, Do it, no one will miss you. Just do it.’. But I heard a voice that overpowered all the rest that said ‘Hold on’. Later on I realised that was God.
My only real outlet was my girlfriend at the time. She was the only one who had a glimpse into the pain I was feeling. So I thank God that she was there at the hardest points to reinforce the words of that voice. ‘Hold on, keep going!’.
The Turning Point
A while later I went to Westfield to meet some of my girlfriends friends and shop. She introduced me as normal; ‘This is my boyfriend Sterling’, but this time was different. One of her friends (let’s call him James for the purpose of this blog) replied in shock ‘There is man in my church with the EXACT SAME NAME AS YOU!’. I think I was more shocked than he was and those would be the words that changed my life forever. So I explained everything to him and told him that this man could be my father!!!! I asked him to find out any information I could to confirm this.
Going on a dad hunt!
Later on that day I got a call from James to say, his family had been in contact with the man and he said he has a son whom he hasn’t seen since he was a baby. All he has is a few baby pictures… Now, please, PLEASE. Try to imagine the complete shock on my face. Is this really happening? What I thought would just be a day in Westfield seemed like it was turning into an opportunity for destiny!
He asked if I wanted to come to church on Sunday and meet this man. Ofcourse I said yes. So I got up, got ready that Sunday morning and found my way to church. Took my seat with James and his Mum. Watching all these people standing up and waving their hands, shouting and dancing to this person they are calling God…. This was my first ever pentecostal experience, I didn’t know why they were shouting, but the music did sound nice! My eyes would lock on every man in the room trying to see if they had any resemblance to me, ‘Maybe that’s my dad, no no, maybe that’s my dad!’.
Anyway, at the end of the service it was time to meet this man. James pointed him out to me and told me to go and talk to him (yes, he left me on my own). So I walked up to the man and said ‘I’m Sterling Record’, He replied ‘Yes I am’ Thinking I had asked if that was his name. So I said ’No no, my name is Sterling Record, I’m your son’. So with complete shock on his face he brought me outside to speak to me privately. Explained that he used to be a bad man, spent time in prison, but when he came out he gave his life to christ and changed his life forever. He apologised for not being around and right there, outside that church. The only thing I had ever wanted in life was now fulfilled. I found my father.
Who is this God they kept talking about?
I kept going to the church to see him and spend more time with him. I even brought my mum just to confirm it was him because apart of me was sure this was all a big prank. He kept talking about this God. God this and God that. At first I didn’t get it but eventually I started to think what If that day in Westfield was a complete set up from God for me to find out He exists? What if this is all his plan? What if my cry for a father was really a cry for my heavenly father, God?
Let’s test this thing out….
So Eventually, I tried prayer. I tried reading the bible, tried singing songs and worshiping God. To my amazement, it was just like the scripture said. I tasted and I saw that the Lord was good. From that point, I’ve been pursuing him ever since. All the issues I had eventually started dropping off (A subject for another blog post) and God really began to show himself as a good good father, friend and helper in my life.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I really pray it increases someone’s faith and even causes someone to believe that God exists. For anyone who is wonder, my relationship with my dad has really come along way and I’m so grateful, but there is no better gift than a relationship with God! If you want to know more, feel free to contact me. I’m super active on Twitter @LordRecord, feel free to DM me 🙂
I’ll see you in the next post!